October 19, 1987. I was 32, and Dale was 38. It was a Monday, Black Monday to be specific. We were on a scuba diving vacation in Mexico, hanging out in a bar sucking down cold long-necks, when we saw the stock market crashed. We had next to nothing in assets at the time, we didn’t even own a home, certainly nothing invested in the stock market. We ordered another round and toasted our good fortune.
That time is gone. We worked hard and made enough money to invest for retirement. These days a good deal of our assets are hard-wired into what happens on Wall Street. I don’t have a pension, but Dale does, so I like to think we balance each other out. All he has to do is keep breathing, and all I have to do is stay calm.
It’s all manageable, and I understand you can’t make short-term decisions in a game that depends on long-term results. That doesn’t mean I have to like it. In fact, I hate the stock market. I’m lucky I had a 401K and incredibly grateful to have cobbled together a decent retirement, but I’m a worst-case scenario kind of gal. Why sleep when I can brood over the possibilities of financial disaster?
I know not to check it every day, but I do log in about once a week … that’s probably too much. But I read about the trade wars and the possibility of a recession, so I like to go online and see if there are any signs our nest egg is headed down the shame spiral. It’s all allocated in low-risk investments, but still. I was a journalism major, and money spazzes me out.
There has been a bit of a downturn, but my 401K is fine. Small losses but nothing unexpected. Our financial planner says we’re in good shape. Our living expenses are covered by Dale’s retirement and other savings right now, and I don’t plan to start withdrawing from my 401K for several more years. Knowing there’s time to recover helps me in my quest to stay relaxed. If you’re squeamish about money like me, I hope you will take comfort in knowing you can learn to live with the stock market.
Retirement is such a privilege. I grew up in a lower middle-class family with low expectations. No one thought I’d make it through high school, let alone college. But I had deep internal drive, and I did the best I could with what I had. I joined the Army right after high school, went to college on the G.I. Bill and moved 23 times in my career.
Although I didn’t do anything particularly brilliant to get here, I was consistently not stupid. I just read that line attributed to Warren Buffet’s partner, Charlie Munger, in this blog post from Joe Hearn at Intentional Retirement. Consistently not stupid seems like such a low bar, but considering the alternatives, I’ll take it. I also liked what Joe said about getting the big things right – a roof over your head, a good relationship with your spouse, good health.
I’m not sure I can ever again be that worry-free diver girl plopped out in the sand on the beach or carelessly sucking down beers in a Mexican bar, but I’d like to channel some of her back to the future. A little less anxiety, a little more live for the moment, trust that I got the big things right and the rest of the cards will fall into place.
As far as channeling goes, I’m thinking I could start small. Naps? Margaritas?