This week is our 40th wedding anniversary, and while we aren’t particularly sentimental, we wanted to do something special to commemorate the occasion. We booked an overnight trip to Bodega Bay, a beautiful seaside town we can drive to in about 2.5 hours.
One of the many perks of retirement is schedule flexibility and going places during the week when prices are usually lower. I checked for every night in every hotel using every travel site on the Internet until I got a good deal. Tuesday night was the least expensive, and even then, it was outrageous. Bodega Bay is not cheap. We like the area because it’s beautiful, close to Sonoma and we love the oysters.
We took the scenic route and stopped for lunch at a beautiful cove where the restaurant specializes in all things seafood. We had clam chowder and split a dozen oysters on the half-shell. Our table overlooked the water. We splurged and each had a Blood Mary. The view was amazing, so we said what the hell and ordered another.
Four Bloodies, soup and oysters added up to one of the most expensive lunches I have ever enjoyed. But Dale had cashed our annual check from USAA, so it was practically free. Then we headed north to our hotel. We were a little early, it was chilly and raining, so we were pleased our room was ready. Perhaps emboldened by the Bloodies, I said, this is our 40th anniversary, I don’t suppose there are any upgrades available?
I’m not normally one to ask for stuff, but I figured you don’t get it if you don’t ask. She went in the back and emerged smiling, confirming a complimentary upgrade to an ocean view room with a fireplace and a luxurious over-sized tub. Bingo!
The room was gorgeous with a spectacular if foggy view. I believe I said in my outside voice I certainly planned to take a bath, but I didn’t seize the faucet in time. Dale announced, I’m taking a bath! Oh, how nice for you. I suppose that will use up all the hot water, but go ahead. Enjoy.
Well, if he gets the tub, I thought, I’m going to relax in the sumptuous robe I saw hanging in the closet. I was prancing around singing “Mama’s got a brand-new robe” and decided to pass on the bath, as it just sucks the life out of me anyway. I needed my strength for the next round of oysters. I crawled into bed wearing my new robe and started to read.
Dale’s in the tub, and I could hear all these bubbles, like a whale surfacing? I honestly didn’t know what to think. He was in there a long time. I thought this is it, after 40 years, I discover his dark secret.
Shamu emerged from the bathroom with no curious afterglow, so I assumed there are manly bathtub things I don’t understand. We hung around until it was time to go for dinner. This time I had scoped out a place with fried oysters on the menu. Fabulous.
On the way back to the hotel, I asked about the noises from the tub. He’s like, what do you mean? I explained the bubbly whale-like sounds I heard, and he said, “Oh, that. I may have farted.”
Oh! Farts! Not some kinkster bathtub sex ritual. What a relief.