The haircut I didn’t want

Yes, a haircut. I wanted long wild goddess hair. I swore I would never get the classic middle-age bob, but at 66, I’m beyond middle age, so I’m going in. Now I have what I hope is a stylish version of the haircut I didn’t want, and I love it!

I have such fine hair to begin with, and it is thinning as I get older. I think this cut makes the most of what I have. Sometimes you just have to accept reality.

With this cut, I gave up the tail. Meaning ponytail. I will not miss it. I was wearing my hair up most of the time because it looked so scraggly, and I won’t miss that, either. I will add a little care and maintenance.

I told my stylist I’m willing to spend 10 minutes a day on it, and I’m OK using a blow dryer. But I only want to use my head as a tool for shaping – no curling or smoothing tools, just blowing it back and forth and a little bit of a round brush to get the right look. I shocked my stylist when I said I would accept a haircut that required trimming every six weeks. She’s used to seeing me once or twice a year.

I got it cut yesterday and was stunned to wake up with great second-day hair. So, maybe 10 minutes every other day?

Now that I’m getting Social Security, I feel a little more generous with my spending. I mean, I didn’t really need those checks to get my hair done regularly, but something in me embraced the idea of a minimalist retiree who never goes to a salon. But I’m over that.

When she finished, I said, “Yeah, that looks like a woman ready to burn through her Social Security.”

It’s not really about the Social Security, although I do like to joke about it. Actually, I’ve been so sick of all the miserable news in the world, and the new kitchen lifted my spirits beyond anything I ever expected.  

Except for golf, I’ve been holed up for two years, and even if it’s another two years thanks to the Ohmygod variant, I decided it’s time to make more of an effort. In some form or fashion, I aim to rejoin the land of the living.

I even pushed back my cuticles and buffed my nails. Filled in the bald patches on my eyebrows. And got dressed in real clothes just to hang around the house.

Living large.

26 thoughts on “The haircut I didn’t want”

  1. I love your haircut! And it’s still longish and worthy of goddess classification.

    I’m going to steal your Ohmygod variant. That’s how I feel about every new twist and turn of the Covid virus. Every time I think it’s getting safer out there…sigh. I’m vaccinated and boostered up and live in a mask-mandated when indoors, State (thank goodness). We’re also a highly vaccinated state and yet it’s still a roller coaster ride. I make and unmake plans all the time. I’m guessing that living in a tourist town contributes to the waxing and waning of cases in our county.

    1. It just feels like it will never end. I’m the same — every time I think I’m ready to get back in the water, I see sharks.

    1. Mine came in quite curly and gray. Over time, the curl went away, but the gray stayed! I miss the curls but love my silver.

    1. I liked doing nothing with my hair for years, but I needed a boost, and this cut did the job.

  5. Excellent haircut and beautiful color. And a bonus of great second day hair.
    I’d get my long hair cut, but I hate going to a salon regularly. Both the money and time aspect plus finding a good stylist. It sounds exhausting. How did you find your stylist?

    1. It’s all that — time, money, effort. I wasn’t into it before, but now I’m willing to give it a try. I can’t remember how I found my stylist. It was after we first moved here, and I think I just walked into a posh-looking place and asked if anyone could cut my hair. I lucked out. She never tried to convince me to color it, and she was happy with the once or twice a year package. I said with every six weeks, you’ll get sick of me. She said, oh, no, I’ll like you better. Funny.

      In the beginning, test them out. Only do a trim, no big changes, and see how that works.

  6. I hear you about the prolonged pandemic response and the bonus of the “old age” pension. I was determined that the first pension check would not be spent on fence posts so I indulged in a piece of art using an encaustic technique – the process of painting with beeswax mixed with damar resin. Your haircut is great. You don’t need my permission or blessing but it’s ok to spend some time and money on yourself. This dialed down life more than allows for some self-care.

    1. Interestingly, we need fence posts … but I went for the haircut instead. I welcome your permission/blessing for self-care. I think a part of my brain thought I wasn’t entitled to it. That not spending money on myself was a badge of honor.

      Oh, and what a great choice for your pension! That sounds amazing.

    1. Thanks, Pam! I’m so glad I had the privilege to work with you, even though it was short-lived. Hope you are well.

  8. I so wish I could get into the habit of looking nice everyday. I had a close friend very lovingly say to me that if I did my face and hair everyday (like she does) I would look lovely. But once again, hair in a pony tail and not a spec of makeup! I do like your cut (and second day no work too?! – wow) and the color is awesome. My gray is coming in “dingy”, and I’m wondering if I’ll ever see your lovely shade of gray on my head.

    1. We’ll see it long it lasts. I really am sick of looking like crap every day. The only makeup I wear is eyebrow filler. “Doing” my face every day is a bridge too far.

  9. Your hair looks great. I have worn my fine, straight hair in a bob for(it seems like)ever. I wash it every other day at the most and, if I’m going somewhere special, blow dry it with a big, round brush. The other days I just let it do what it wants. I find headbands very useful if you don’t mind looking like a 6-year-old.

    1. Thanks for the tip — I will experiment with headbands. For fine hair, this might be the perfect haircut. It actually feels thick!

  10. I’ve always had tricky hair and the only thing which worked was a really great cut. Whenever I’ve had to change hairdressers, I’ve hyperventilated. You can imagine me during the early months of the pandemic. I got desperate and allowed Himself to take his clippers to it. He got brave and took scissors to the fringe too, which I think may’ve been a step too far. I’m not sure how to get that back without going back to the professionals, although I really like not paying out mega-bucks for the experience. I’m in pondering mode and wondering why the sculpting gel stuff simply falls out of my hair in minutes, so the spiky short look isn’t working either. Sigh. But you hair (both cut & colour) look fab & terribly stylish.

    1. My husband cut my hair during the first part of the pandemic. He did a pretty good job! I also liked not paying out mega-bucks for the experience, but I finally caved. Sometimes we need professionals. I normally hate all hair products, but my stylist encouraged me to buy this product:

      https://www.kerastase-usa.com/styling/lincroyable-blowdry-hair-lotion.html

      I assume you could get it in the UK. Because my hair is fine, she said to use one pump only. I like that, as I don’t feel so gunked up. I can’t believe how great this stuff is. My hair is lasting three days — a little heat refreshes the product.

      May you find hair peace soon!

  11. Beautiful, Donna.
    I liked your more wilder look as well, but can understand you wanted a change. And you’re a lucky fish to have a good stylist!
    Lately I got a haircut from a new stylist and it came out as a disaster. Made an appointment at another one, an thank God, she could fix it. Of course it’s shorter than I wanted, which I find disturbing while doing my weight training.

    You’re plaid shirt is very charming, love the colours.

    1. Hi, Barbara! It’s more like I NEEDED a change due to the thinning. I’m sorry you had a hair disaster. It’s always a risk, which is another reason why I just kept letting it grow. But that’s the good news — your shorter hair will grow back.

      Thank you for noticing my shirt! I was just trying to figure out how old it is. At least 10 years old, maybe older. I have two. It’s a cheap brand from Target, and it shrunk in length when I machine dried it. So it’s almost cropped, hitting just above the hips. For me, it’s perfect!

  12. That’s how I wear my hair too. During Covid year I grew out the white/silver and the spiky pixie, and I love the new look. I do get dressed every day Covid or not, going out of house or not. I wear a smidge of makeup most days,earrings and a necklace,even. I feel better when I look a little better. I’ve decided to spend a little more money on skin care..Ponds cold cream isn’t cutting it anymore,lol!

    I lost 22 pounds over the past 6 months and splurged on FIVE new tops/blouses/pullovers from my favorite upscale consignment store.. they carry good brands like Chicos, Ann Taylor,Mark Jacob and I paid from $9-$11 for each piece! One top had the tags still on!

    A next door neighbor also lost weight and gave me three pair of almost new nice jeans that fit me like a glove!! LUCKY DAY!

    So, am all set for “winter” in Arizona.

    You look fabulous with the new hair. I find I enjoy my every 7 weeks hair stylist appt.I like to visit with my gal —she’s like me and loves to discuss the taboo topics: sex,politics,religion…. and she does my hair beautifully and it helps the economy—HERS in particular. She has a home studio and I cannot believe I only pay $30. I tip well!!

    Happy Holidays to you and your hub.

    1. I should upgrade my skincare, but I don’t really know where to start. I have been getting dressed every day, and it does make a difference.

      Congrats on losing weight! And for getting such a great deal on new clothes.

      I like my stylist, too. She said I’m the only one she knows who swears more than she does.

      1. I am not a high end skin care person. I researched carefully and ended up buying Cerave hydrating cleanser (around 10 dollars) for getting makeup off, before bedtime. It’s a game changer for me..my skin was so dry it hurt and this cleanser is gentle and hydrating but gets the makeup off. I don’t use soap in morning.Just rinse or shower. I use Cetahil moisture cream, the one in a jar for very dry skin, not the pump bottle..the pump bottle moisturizer was not enough for my very very dry skin.The cream is perfect and a little goes a long way.( Was around 10 dollars too I think.) I use in in the morning and a little at night. I also bought an AHA lotion, by Alphahydroxy, the 8% . It costs around 16 dollars for a bottle which lasts a while.It seriously reduces the redness in my skin,after about 2 weeks of use. That’s about it for skin care..I actually started this regimen about 6 months ago and my skin is looking and feeling better.. I wear Cover Girl Ageless foundation maybe every other day. Orgasm blush from Nars, the sample size is just 10 dollars at Sephora, and lasts forever. A wipe of mascara now and then,not every day. I don’t like running I to stores so I purchase all this on amazon and have it brought right to my doorstep!

        1. I’ve been using Cetaphil cleanser and Neutrogena moisturizers — one with SPF and one without. It’s just not doing the job. I have more zits than I’ve ever had in my life. I’ll look into the AHA lotion when I muster the strength to check out all the other products.

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