Category: Food & Drink

Betrayed by pie

I don’t know why apple pie has to be so hard. Soggy bottom crust, mushy apples, unnecessary feedback from your spousal unit. It’s one betrayal after another.

This year, I dug out a recipe from the Cook’s Illustrated site, which I subscribe to. Classic Apple Pie. I was tempted to use a different crust but decided to follow the recipe exactly. Because I’m a rules-follower. I’m not always rewarded for such allegiance, but that’s how I roll.

Their recipe called for a mix of Granny Smith and McIntosh apples. I knew the McIntosh would be hard to find, so I read through the comments and saw Pink Lady or Jonagold would be good substitutes. I used Pink Lady. I hate apple pie that has the consistency of apple sauce, so getting that part right was important.

At least it was to me.

The dough was a little dry and difficult to work with. I had to patch it in places, and it was too thick in some areas, but I couldn’t get it to roll out any thinner without cracks. I will say the pie cooked beautifully and looked perfect. However, I have experience with soap opera apple pie – the bad and the beautiful – so I assumed nothing.

Dinner was exceptional. The turkey was crisp on the outside and juicy in the middle, the stuffing was savory with crusty bits and the creamy mashed potatoes were like pillows waiting to be kissed with succulent gravy love. OK, that was a little over the top, but it was damned good. We shared a bottle of Pinot Noir.

We should have just stopped there and skipped dessert. But noooooo. There would be pie.

The texture of the apples was perfect and the seasoning was divine, but the crust was unevenly cooked, and Dale said the flavor wasn’t as good as my regular crust. I focused on the positives and raved about the consistency of the apples, when Dale said it didn’t matter to him. It could be applesauce, as long as the crust was good.

WRONG ANSWER.

Why am I busting my ass finding the perfect recipe if all I have to do is scoop out some apple sauce and throw a slab of crust on top? I was in kind of a snit when I went to bed. That’s why I woke up early ruminating about what went wrong with the apple pie.

Lying there in bed, I decided first to cancel my Cook’s Illustrated subscription. Fuck them. They think they’re so smart. Then I decided I’d go back to Ina Garten’s recipe for apple crostata, except I’d use this Cook’s Illustrated filling and a different crust recipe. And I’d probably have to adjust the cooking time. I planned to spend my day gathering all the recipes and creating a new one.

Then we got up and settled in for breakfast. Honestly, I was still full, so I just started with coffee. Dale went for the apple pie. I’m like, you don’t have to eat that. You’re under no obligation. I’m prepared to toss it. And then I couldn’t stop myself. It just came out.

If you prefer, I’ll just find you some apple sauce and throw a little crust on top.

Well, in terms of responses, that was not my best choice. All he said was, “Just stop it.”

Still, I was kind of happy thinking about what it would look like as it got sucked into the garbage disposal while I watched Dale gobble it up like it was his last meal. Because I was thinking, it could well be.

He practically licked the plate and then looked up and said, “I’m not sucking up to you, but that pie was absolutely delicious.”

What? I cut myself a small piece. Just a sliver, because I see more gravy in my future. But he was right. While the crust was still a bit unevenly cooked, most of it was crisp, crumbly and yummy. Perhaps everything tastes better when you don’t eat like you’ll be visiting the vomitorium later.

I’m not canceling my subscription to Cook’s Illustrated. They are fine people, and I’m sorry I said those bad things about them. I made notes to the recipe, which I will make again, but I’ll tinker with the pastry dough or use my other go-to crust recipe.

And so another Thanksgiving comes to a close. Even after three years of being retired, it still feels like a four-day weekend. I’m looking forward to lots of leftovers. Perhaps even another piece of pie.

Roadkill pizza & home haircuts

Preparing to snip off the ends of my hair using the patented pigtail technique.

I started to get in a funk this week. The pandemic. Trump. Just the weight of it all taking a toll, and I say that as someone who has it pretty damn easy. Do you suppose there’s a sleeping pill I can take tonight and wake up Jan. 20?

My remedy was to make another donation to the food bank and just get on with life. The whole simple pleasures thing. One good laugh, and I’m OK. Thankfully, Dale delivered.

He came back from a run and said there was a pizza box by someone’s trash with leftover pizza hanging out the side. He said it was kind of gross smashed up on the street and missing a couple of bites, but then he added, “You know, it still looked good.”

I don’t know. I find it highly amusing to think pizza still looks good even when it’s essentially road kill. Fortunately, I have a personal pizza chef. Tonight’s is what we call Punishment Pizza. Shrimp, goat cheese, Kalamata olives, basil and habanero peppers.

Other highlights from the week:

  • Finished watching River on Amazon Prime. Wow. Part moody cop drama and part otherworldly romance. Oh, and there’s an old disco song you will never get out of your brain. I’ve re-watched the last episode several times just for the dance scene with Stellan Skarsgård and Nicola Walker.
  • Validated my hypothesis that pumpkin cheesecake is good for breakfast. And then I tested it again just to be sure.
  • Splurged on another pair of “yoga” pants. At 65, I need some structure. My favorites are the Headlands Hybrid Cargo Tight from Athleta. At $108, they are not cheap, but these pants are durable, comfortable, versatile and flattering.
  • For a brief moment, I missed the feeling of being good at my job. Then I remembered the executive who had a temper tantrum when the company began to promote work-life balance. He said work was life and didn’t require balance. I realized I’m actually pretty good at retirement.
  • Decided to hoard my woodburning art creations as some sort of primitive documentation that I was here. Like etchings from the pandemic cave.
  • Cut my hair using the patented pigtail technique. I don’t think I’m losing abnormal amounts of hair, but I cleaned the bathroom today, and it’s like King Kong shaved in there. I have entertained the idea of buzzing it all off.

Waiting for marshmallows

A snip from my reading spreadsheet.

New covid restrictions

Our county was among most in California that got bumped back down to the strictest tier of COVID restrictions. I go four places – the golf course, the grocery store, the library and the outdoor swimming pool at my health club.

I believe the library will have to close, but I can still get curb-side pick-up and digital books. The health club can no longer have indoor activities, and I would be surprised if they keep the pool open. Perhaps no swimming for me.

All in all – no big deal. We are prepared to ride this out. As social misfits, it seems like we were born to hunker down. Even before the pandemic, I’d freak if the doorbell rang. Who could that be? What do they want?

The governor is also thinking about a curfew. As in maybe shutting everything down by 10 p.m. OK by me. I forgot people stayed out that late. And I’ve long maintained nothing good happens after midnight.

Just so you know, I am an equal opportunity critic. Governor Newsom went to a dinner party at the famous Napa restaurant, The French Laundry. Aside from the ridiculous cost when people in the state he represents are suffering and dying, and normal restaurants can’t survive, people from several different households attended the dinner. It was outdoors, so he thought it was OK.

Seriously. He should know better. I like the guy and overall, I think he’s doing a good job, but that was just plain dumb. To his credit, he apologized, which is something his critics in Washington can’t seem to manage. I can forgive someone who makes a mistake and admits it.

I think a lot about why people can’t band together and do what it takes to control the spread of this virus. I’ve concluded some people are just stupid or arrogant, and others lack the discipline to stay the course.

Remember the marshmallow test? Social science researchers put a marshmallow in front of a child and said she could have a second one – but only if she can last 15 minutes without eating the first one. The kids who can hold out for double the payout presumably have the willpower to do well in school, work and life.

Somewhere along the line, it seems we ended up with a boatload of people who can’t wait for the second marshmallow. And here we are.

Comfort Food

That’s why God invented comfort food. I’ve been making a list of our favorite decadent dishes we hope to make over the next several months. Of course, we don’t eat like this every night.

  • Stuffed Cabbage – cabbage rolls stuffed with ground meat (we use bison) and rice and simmered for hours in a hearty tomato sauce. Served with dark rye bread and European butter.
  • Transylvanian Layered Cabbage – a casserole with layers of sauerkraut, rice, sour cream and a mixture of ground pork, diced bacon and thin-sliced smoked sausage that has been well-browned. Served with dark rye bread and European butter.
  • Venison Meatloaf – a retro meatloaf made in a ring mold. Seasoned with onion soup mix, topped with a tangy ketchup-brown sugar sauce and smothered with melted jack cheese. Accompanied by wide egg noodles in a thick poppy seed-sour cream sauce.
  • Roast Duck – duckling roasted crisp in the oven with a slightly sweet orange sauce. Maybe some wild rice and a veggie to go with, but it’s all about the duck.
  • Beef Stroganoff – thin slices of beef tenderloin browned with sautéed mushrooms in a sour cream-shallot sauce. Served over wide egg noodles.
  • Porchetta Tarts – individual free-form tarts in a pastry crust filled with a pork-pancetta mixture, seasoned with fennel and sage and served with sage-butter sauce.

non-edible entertainment

As for entertainment you can’t eat, I’m back on the Department Q series by Jussi Adler-Olsen. For some reason, I had a hard time getting started with The Marco Effect, which is fifth in the series. I’ve checked it out three times and never read it, finally going back one more time. And it turned out to be my favorite so far. I think it was election stress that kept me from focusing.

All of the sudden I’m a fan of British crime shows. I started with Unforgotten, free on Amazon Prime. I absolutely adore Nicola Walker as DCI Cassie Stuart leading the department that investigates cold cases. The show is less about violence and more about how crime affects people’s lives.

I’m just starting River, which is on Netflix and also features Nicola Walker. Amazon has a bunch more British crime shows, but most of them are not on Prime. BritBox would be another option, but I don’t want another subscription at this time. We’ll see how long that lasts!

Dessert rules

Flash-freezing individual pieces of pumpkin cheesecake before sealing up for storage.

Retirement Dreams

I’ve had weird retirement dreams lately. Most are variations of the same basic theme. I’m working at my old job but wondering why there isn’t more money in my bank account. Did they forget to pay me? Then I realize I wasn’t working at all and haven’t had a job in three years. I wake up happy.

The others involve business travel. Packing, unpacking, getting to the airport, hauling luggage, missing flights, attending conferences, team-building. More of a nightmare than a dream.

Trust but verify

The weather has turned cold by California standards – and I’m going through my annual period of shock. I’ve maintained membership at the health club, where there are two large outdoor pools for swimming laps. I don’t use the locker room and have a swim poncho to cover up while I slip out of my wet swimsuit. All in all, pretty low COVID risk.

Last year, the “family” pool was heated to about 85 degrees in the colder months. The main lap pool is 78 degrees year-round. I loved the warmer pool and kept up with my swimming all winter. I wear a thermal swim shirt even in the warmer pool.  

I noticed the family pool didn’t seem as warm over the past several weeks, but then it was still somewhat hot outside. I figured they are trying to save money since membership is down. Or maybe it’s just a little early to crank up the heat. I filled out a form inquiring about the temperature. Someone called me and said they would be heating it as per usual.

Although I wanted to trust, I also wanted to verify. Last week I swam twice, and it was barely warm enough for me. Now that it’s officially cold outside, I expect warm water. If they were going to raise the temperature of the pool, I figured it would take a few days, so I’ve been waiting. Yesterday was the test.

I am such a heat whore, and I knew the water would probably feel cool to me no matter what. But I also knew I could swim comfortably if it registered somewhere in the 80s. I packed my Thermapen!

The instant read thermometer was in the pocket of my poncho, and I walked to the edge of the pool. Dipped the Thermapen in, and got my read … 84 degrees! I had a great swim and look forward to continuing throughout the winter.

Dessert rules

Thanksgiving, as per usual, will be just the three of us – Me, Dale and Riley, our cat. Riley doesn’t like people food except for melted butter and tuna juice, so he’s easy. The main meal is consistent from year to year. Roast turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, broccoli or green beans, cranberry sauce.

Dessert has fewer rules. But I make the rules, so it’s all good.

Last year, I made pumpkin cheesecake, and it was the bomb. Dale liked it a lot, but he prefers apple pie. I wanted pumpkin cheesecake again, but apple pie sounds particularly good for some reason. Then there’s that whole thing about making Dale happy.

It has been a tough year, so I’m going all-out indulgent. We will have both … because dessert rules!

Individual pieces of cheesecake freeze well, so I’ll make it next week and save those yummy treats for later. I should be embarrassed to share this, but pumpkin cheesecake is delicious for breakfast. Pie is less freezer-worthy, so that will be our dessert on Thanksgiving.

I always fret about which apples to use. Cook’s Illustrated likes a mix of Granny Smith and either McIntosh, Jonagold or Pink Lady. A lot of it depends on where you live and what’s available.

when chores go bad

I’ve been such a slug lately and decided yesterday to take care of a long-neglected chore. We had a small pile of broken appliances otherwise known as e-waste. A recycling station not far from our house accepts e-waste for free.

After loading up the car, I accidentally pushed the wrong button on the garage door opener. It’s a 3-car garage, and we use that smaller side for storage. Lots of stuff is propped up against the door, and when I pushed that button, everything went to shit.

I had to shove it all back in to get the door even partially closed. Then I headed off for the recycling center, where they informed me their e-waste bins were full. Might I want to head up the road a few miles for the recycling station in the next town over?

Sure. Upon arrival, I was informed their e-waste recycling bins were full. Then my head exploded. Then I came home to the big mess I made prior to leaving. I cleaned all that up and unloaded my e-waste from the car, making a tidy little pile on the floor.

No good deed goes unpunished.   

Upgrading kitchen tools

Our 46-year-old hand mixer on the left, and the new one on the right. Notice the beaters.

At this stage of our lives, we try not to load up on stuff, but kitchen necessities are a special category. Although we’re cautious about what we buy, it seems like we’ve been spending a lot. We’ve purchased a few relatively inexpensive tools, but you know, everything adds up.  

Two things broke, and we replaced them. We bought a new can opener ($19.95) and a new immersion blender ($50). Our choice was a no-nonsense 2-Speed Kitchenaid Immersion Blender. We don’t make smoothies, so we don’t need ice-crushing power. I pretty much use it for mayonnaise and to puree soups and sauces. The Kuhn Rikon can opener is slick.  

We upgraded several tools, including a fantastic new citrus juicer ($22.29). I’ve pretty much moved on from mojitos to margaritas, but both need copious amounts of lime, so I rest my case.  

For 20 years, I used a tortilla press with a wobbly hinge. I replaced it with this beauty by Victoria ($36.89). It’s the same size as my old one – 6.5 inches – but I cannot believe the difference. It’s heavy and presses an exceptionally smooth tortilla. I’ve also used it to flatten out naan.

Next up was the hand mixer. Dale had the Sunbeam before he met me, so we’re thinking it’s 46 years old. There was a power surge button that is held together with duct tape, but other than that, it seemed to work fine. The two main things I use it for are to beat egg whites for souffles and to whip mashed potatoes. And yes, I know there are more foodie ways to mash potatoes.

Anyway, I thought my egg whites weren’t stiff enough, so we went with a new hand mixer. I bought the Kitchenaid 5-speed directly from Kitchenaid ($50). The beaters are very different. The new design seems to be a technological advancement. I’ve been super-impressed with the results on egg whites and mashies. Anything more complicated than that, I use the heavy-duty stand mixer.

The final upgrade is a new panini maker. We had the original Cousinart Griddler, which did not have a floating hinge to adjust for thicker sandwiches. The plates were not removable, either. Still, we used it for 12 years with great success.

Dale really wanted one with a floating hinge. Removable plates are a nice feature as well. I researched all the big brands and went with the upgraded Cousinart Griddler ($79). The floating hinge is not exactly a floating hinge, according to Dale, but the height is adjustable, which has the same effect, so he’s good with it. It does more than we need, but it’s not gigantic. We’re not likely to use it as an indoor grill, but you never know.

One of the features I like is that you can buy extra plates and use the Griddler to make waffles. I’ve been, well, waffling about buying a stand-alone waffle maker for years, but I don’t think we would eat waffles often enough to justify it. The Griddler might not make the world-class Belgian waffles of your dreams, but as least we’ll have waffles at home, which I can have with real syrup. Waffle plates are still on my wish list.

The last three items on this shopping spree gone mad are new, as in not a replacement. I’ve been drooling over all the gorgeous bundt pans that are available now, but I just don’t see me making many bundt cakes. So far, I’ve successfully dodged that bullet.

However, I did succumb to a basic scone pan ($31.41). You don’t really need one, but mine become quite irregular when they bake, and I like the idea of containing them for a more uniform shape. I ordered the pan from King Arthur, because it was on sale, and I was getting other stuff anyway.

Also in the baking category, I ordered four stainless steel 6-inch pie pans ($31.94) I love to make savory pies, and I like the idea of making two for us and two for the freezer. The pie pans should arrive tomorrow, just in time to make these mini chicken pot pies from Ree Drummond.

Finally, I bought a rack ($49.99) for drying pasta. I like to make pasta earlier in the day, so I don’t have to mess with it when it comes times to start cooking. The rack keeps the pasta from sticking together as it sits. This little guy works great.

As for spending a lot, now that I add it up, it doesn’t seem so bad. Total cost was $371.47. We haven’t eaten in a restaurant or been anywhere in eight months. But we eat well, and sometimes you just gotta have the right tool for the job.

In theory, I subscribe to the rule of 1 for 1 … you buy something new, you get rid of something else. I have plans to gift the panini maker, but I can’t quite seem to part with that hand mixer. Maybe those new-fangled beaters will turn out to be a hoax. I don’t know … something is telling me to keep it.

Hoarding unflavored gelatin

Unflavored Gelatin Shortage?

Toilet paper, hand sanitizer, disinfectant wipes and other commodities that were off the radar for awhile seem to be back in stock, but have you looked for unflavored gelatin? I couldn’t find it online or in any store I visited. I did a Google search and found some food message boards with people asking if anyone else has noticed a shortage of unflavored gelatin.

I use unflavored gelatin to make marshmallows or occasionally something like a salmon mousse. I like to have some in the pantry, and I was completely out. After a couple of weeks, our local store had a box – but it was a 32-pack.

Bought it. It felt sort of like hoarding, but marshmallows can’t be silenced.

Although I don’t know what the issue is, in some ways, the 32-pack seems like a pretty slick marketing move.

Convince people there’s a shortage. No more of the little orange boxes to be found. Then introduce the jumbo supply of unflavored gelatin, and your sales immediately increase. I’m no marketing expert, but even I can see the flaws in this theory. The jumbo box is actually a lifetime supply, so when the surge is over, it’s over.

All that to say, I see marshmallows in my future.

Cannabis Kitty

In other serious matters, my cat has discovered marijuana. I have a small plant growing indoors, and all of the sudden, he was like, gee, I wonder what that is? Riley likes to sit on the window ledge and chomp on the leaves. He does not seem worse for the wear.

I researched it, and it seems lots of cats like to chew on the leaves. But they aren’t getting high, because the THC has not been activated by heat, and the leaves are pretty benign to begin with. I’m trying not to stress about it.

Welcome to Medicare

I’m officially on Medicare! I will turn 65 later this month, but Medicare went into effect today. I mentioned it to Dale when I got in the car with him to run an errand, and I said, “Don’t make me have to use it.” We have serious differences about how to drive and how to park.

But we do agree politically, so at least it’s not like living in the Conway family (of Kellyanne and George fame). I think I’d have to run away from home.

Anyway, the premiums are either deducted from your Social Security or paid quarterly. Unless something changes, I don’t plan on taking Social Security until my full retirement age, which is 66 and two months. I made my first quarterly payment.

I didn’t know this at first, and you might not either, but some of us pay more for Medicare than others, because they base it on your income taxes. My company paid out some long-term incentives that increased our income for two years after I retired, resulting in a higher Medicare premium.

Our income is back to retirement normal now, so the system should catch up and reduce our premiums within a couple of years. We file jointly, and Dale’s are higher, too, but he doesn’t notice, since it’s deducted from his Social Security.

This will also be the first year of getting the super-sized flu shot for those 65 and older. Yet another exciting milestone! I guess I’ll wait until late September or early October so it will last the whole season.

Groundhog Day all over again

I’ve been dreaming about going back to work. These are real nighttime dreams – not aspirational thinking. In one dream, President Obama asked me to come back to Texas, where I was needed in the defense industry. I said yes, I mean, for America, sure, but when I woke up, I was like, fuck, that was dumb.

In reality, I have no interest in a job. I thought a lot about why I’m having these dreams, and I believe it’s about a search for distraction. We’re living this Groundhog Day existence, and I’ve grown quite sick of the whole thing. Pandemic, fires, air quality, racism, politics – you name it, and I’m sick of it.

Work is the ultimate distraction. For years, a job served me well in my quest for something else to think about besides the crap that infiltrates my brain.

I’m convinced some people don’t want to retire, because then you don’t have that distraction anymore, and you kind of have to figure out who you really are. What’s your core value as a human being, and how are you going to spend your time on the planet?

Heavy stuff. In many ways, work is easier. Wouldn’t you rather be mad at your boss than mad at yourself?

That said, I’m still all about resisting the pressure to conform and perform. I’m post-job, living the Bohemian heiress lifestyle, dabbling in what amuses me, and I’m all the better for it.

Methinks it’s just a touch of cabin fever right now. I do believe we will get through this mess one way or the other, and I look forward to celebrating in grand style. Maybe even get on an airplane and go somewhere.

I know. Crazy talk.

lost in space

We actually have a favorite sausage market in Sacramento, but it closed after a big fire earlier this year. The brats were as good as any I had in Germany. A friend recommended another sausage market in Lockeford, a rural community about an hour from our house. Dale and I decided to take a road trip.

I had my phone, but I wasn’t sure about cellular service, so we packed a real map, and I wrote down the general directions. In the town of Ione, we got to a critical juncture in the journey – left, right or straight ahead – and the phone flipped out. First, it said I lost cellular data. Then it started telling me to make all kinds of crazy turns.

We tried straight ahead, and that didn’t work. We turned around and came back to the juncture, turning right. There was a remarkable absence of highway signs, and we weren’t sure we were on the right road, but to quote Bruce Springsteen, we took a wrong turn, and we just kept going.

The landscape was dry and barren and looked like Mars.

Dale was excited to pass Rancho Seco, a decommissioned nuclear generation plant. Oh, the sights to behold! And we can now say we’ve been to Galt, all 5.9 square miles of it.

In the end, we added about 30 minutes to our trip. We found the sausage market, loaded up and got on the correct road going back. I was curious to see where we’d land when we hit Ione, where we made all the wrong choices.

As we drove into the town, it became clear we should have made a left. Well, now we know.

Dale grilled one of the brats last night, and it was delicious, but I actually prefer the brats from Sac, which were emulsified like a hot dog. The brats from Lockeford were chunky. Still good, but I need to see if the other place is rebuilding. One can only hope.

lime squeezing happiness

To end on a bright note, as proof positive there is still good in the world, I bought a new citrus juicer, and it’s the most amazing kitchen tool I’ve purchased in years.

I highly recommend this little gadget, especially if you have weak wrists and enjoy lime-based cocktails (just an example). It sucks the juice right out and leaves a little more than a hockey puck as residue.

Life among the hermetically sealed

I was preparing for locusts when the fires came. The fires are a good distance from us. We are safe, but the air quality is terrible. We weren’t going anywhere anyway. Now we’re hermetically sealed. I haven’t been outside in days.

Key words: We are safe.

Nothing to complain about. Many indoor amusements.

Art (or something like it)

I’m still having fun with my woodburning art. If nothing else, it’s a wonderful distraction while spending days on end at home. I didn’t want to clutter up the house with my masterpieces, so my completed projects are hanging in the garage until I decide what to do with them.

I asked a friend to look at my online gallery and pick out one for herself. She chose my favorite one so far! I used oil-based pencils for the deep, bold colors and standard colored pencils for areas with subtle shading. I love the range of reds and yellows, which she said will complement her living room furniture.

Pallet scrap burned and embellished with a combination of oil-based pencils and standard colored pencils.

I’m experimenting with a new technique on my current piece. I’ve used an acrylic paint glaze to color the larger areas, and now I’m adding a background design with burned-in dots. The glaze is sort of rustic looking, and I even sanded a little bit over it to roughen it up more. The glazing process is time-consuming, but I seem to have plenty of time on my hands.

Work in progress — the blots are colored with an acrylic glaze, and I’m adding a dotted pattern in the background.

Books & TV

On the entertainment front, I’ve been watching Anne with an E on Netflix. There are only three seasons, and I will be sad when it ends. Total escapism. The series is based on the Anne of Green Gables books, which I never read as a child. Sometimes childhood classics don’t hold up when you read them as an adult, but I still might give the series a try.

I’ve also found some books only seem to be written for children or young adults. I read all the Tarzan books in my 20s and loved them. Just so you know, Jane was badass! Other children’s books I’ve read as an adult include the Harry Potter novels, A Wrinkle in Time and The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane. I also love the Stuart Little and Paddington Bear movies.

There’s something simple and healing about stories for young audiences. I might just make a regular thing of it. Do you have any favorite children’s books or movies you’ve enjoyed as an adult?

Food

As a foodie, I highly recommend the Food Network series, Amy Schumer Learns to Cook. She and her chef husband are quite the opposites and hilarious together. He likes to cook with fennel, and her reactions are priceless.

We went on another Mexican kick this week. Sometimes we just can’t stop ourselves. Dale made carnitas one night, I made chicken tacos another. Oh, and a dish I jokingly call huevos dineros. It’s my twisted version of huevos rancheros amped up for dinner. A crisp corn tortilla topped with homemade chili sauce, Cheddar cheese and a runny fried egg, accompanied by shredded iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, sliced avocados and a dollop of sour cream.

Today I’m making an overnight no-knead dough that will magically produce baguettes tomorrow. We’ll have those with a ripe Brie, Italian cold cuts and maybe some smoked salmon. Greens on the side. My sister sent us a beautiful assortment of balsamic vinegar, which will certainly have an important role in this meal.

Today’s dinner is unknown at this point, but we swore an oath it will be vegetable-centric to make up for the excesses we enjoyed earlier in the week.

Cognitive tests for dummies

A sampling of our Mexican cookbooks.

Cognitive tests

I’m no fan, but I’d like to thank President Trump for talking about the results of his cognitive test. Now I know you have to count backward from 100 by 7s, and I know I must avoid taking this test or I can say bye-bye car keys. The truth is, I can’t count forward to 100 by 7s.

Let’s call it a learning disability, but I struggle with math. In school, I barely got through algebra, and geometry was next in line to feast on the remains of my carcass. High school geometry was like going to class where everyone was speaking in tongues. I remember sitting there, dizzy with confusion, thinking, “Oh, fuck.”

I got into college anyway. That’s why God invented the journalism major.

Even today, I often use my fingers for simple addition. Dale calls it the digital calculator. As for cognitive tests, he suggested I apply for an accommodation. While other people have service animals, I would ask to bring my service calculator.

Although my earlier idea for a service cat didn’t work out, I’m willing to give the calculator a try. I’m already thinking about a name. A little vest.

COVID update

The COVID-19 numbers in our county are going up. Dale and I huddled this morning to reassess our situation and discuss course corrections. After a robust discussion, we concluded we’re already being quite prudent and are not making any changes at this time. That means we will continue to go to the grocery store as needed, and I will continue to play golf.

In a lot of ways, this is easier for us, because the closest family member is several hundred miles away, and we haven’t made any close friends since we moved here when I retired. This is pretty much how we lived before the pandemic.

We decided to stock up on a few essentials – mostly paper goods – but to otherwise avoid purchasing a lot of extra food. We have two refrigerators and a well-stocked chest freezer, so we feel good about our options. We’re also flexible about what we eat – if they are out of one thing, then we’ll have something else.

Pandemic hobbies for foodies

When I think about food, I am so grateful neither one of us is a picky eater. I can’t imagine how people arrive at conclusions about common foods they will and won’t eat. But then I’m in recovery. I was picky as a child but eventually grew out of it. Although I like some liver, about the only thing I won’t eat are entrails and internal organs. Just because it grosses me out.

We cook a lot of Mexican food, so we stock a hearty supply of dried beans – pinto and black. I recently concluded we are in a rut, relying on the standards we’ve made for years … tacos, burritos, tostadas. In wild pandemic craziness, I reorganized the cookbooks, and for the most part, lumped like-cuisines together. Oversized books have a special shelf and are in no particular order.

I found 14 cookbooks dedicated to Mexican food! I started going through them to learn more about the full scope of the food from Mexico and to see what we might have overlooked the first time around. It’s a fun pandemic hobby … if you’re a foodie. The first book I tackled was “The Cuisines of Mexico” by Diana Kennedy. It was published in 1972.

She writes about certain foods being nearly impossible to find in the U.S. – tomatillos, fresh tortillas. She even said Monterey Jack cheese was hard to find in some parts of the country. I remember buying cilantro for the first time at a Korean market in the early 70s, and it came in a pot. Of course, now it’s everywhere. When we lived in Germany the first time, we bought tortillas in a can. We are so fortunate these days to have such a wide variety of foods readily available.  

There’s a new documentary out about Diana Kennedy, who is 97. I haven’t seen it yet, but in the reviews, some question her legacy – a privileged white woman who became a so-called expert on Mexican cuisine? Others beat her up for being so puritanical about her version of authenticity. Still, she gets grudging respect as someone who did her research and earned her stripes.

I owe her one for teaching me to make tortillas. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

The mojito report

Mojito, a cocktail made with white rum, lime, mint and club soda.
Blind taste testing club soda. See? Cloth face coverings have many uses.

The humorist Russell Baker said June was about making the seasonal switch to gin and tonic. Or as I always say, nothing spoils summer like brown liquor.

While I do enjoy a G&T, I wanted to try something different and decided July was about making the seasonal switch to the mojito. It has been a burden to test this for you, but I believe in giving back. This is my report.

The mojito is a Cuban cocktail with white rum, lime, fresh mint, sugar and club soda served over crushed ice. It’s a perfect summer drink. I experimented a little with ingredients and technique. Again, it’s all about giving back.

Rum

So far, I’ve only used Bacardi Superior, because that’s what we had. It’s smooth and subtle. I like it, although I am eager to try another kind for the purpose of scientific discovery.

Sugar

Some recipes call for sugar and some call for simple syrup. I made a batch of simple syrup and used that. It’s great. To make simple syrup, all you do is heat a cup of sugar and a cup of water and stir until completely dissolved. It keeps in the refrigerator forever.

Mint

Fresh mint is the only option, but there are debates on whether you should muddle the leaves. I tried it both ways, and muddled leaves released more mint flavor. Some say muddling makes the mint turn bitter, but I did not find that to be the case. To muddle, just put the mint in a cocktail shaker or other vessel and poke it a bit with the end of a wooden spoon.

Lime

One whole lime per drink. I don’t like to measure more than I have to, and I found most limes squeeze equally.

Club Soda

For you, dear readers, I did a blind taste test, which by the way, is another great use for your cloth face covering! We had some Canada Dry club soda, and I used that first. Then I bought a bottle of Fever Tree club soda, which is the fancy stuff. I tried that and declared it better, but I was wondering if it was all psychological. Hence the blind taste test.

I poured the water in small glasses and labeled each with painter’s tape. I asked Dale to mix them up while I turned away. I put on my mask, and he led me to the table and helped me put my hands on the glasses. Such a guy.

Honestly, I couldn’t detect a difference. They’re both delicious.

Instructions

Dale’s favorite cocktail is gin-based, so the mojito is just for me. I like that there’s a little labor involved, so I only have one and don’t run back for another. They go down pretty easy.

Put three or four mint leaves in some sort of a vessel. I use a cocktail shaker. Muddle gently with the end of a wooden spoon. Add two ounces of white rum, the juice of one whole lime and two tablespoons of simple syrup. I hate dirtying up measuring spoons, so I actually measured the tablespoons that come with our flatware, and they are, indeed, tablespoons.

I use a margarita glass and fill it about a little more than halfway with crushed ice. I drop one of the squeezed out lime halves into the glass. Pour the cocktail over the ice and then fill it the rest of the way with club soda. You can garnish with more mint for show, but I find it perfect as is.

Respectfully submitted,

Donna Pekar